The art of the extended metaphor:

Now, Keira Knightley’s acting has always been wooden. This time it’s like a petrified forest of woodenness. I mean you really feel like you could build a very nice piece of Ikea furniture out of her performance. It’s that bad.

And when she Orlando Bland are on screen together, it’s like watching two chairs mating. And there’s a scene in which they have to kiss and [it’s like] ”What is that, is that a nest of tables?” No, it’s Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley having some kind of red hot passionate embrace that is positively teak-y. You feel like you have to get out the varnish and varnish it.

YouTube: Mark Kermode arvostelee Pirates of the Caribbeanin kolmososan. Lisää nannaa MetaFilterissä.